Powerless
by supercellchaser
Summary: "Castiel was not human, he could not pull of acting human no matter how hard he tried. That made becoming basically human so much harder."  Sam/Castiel H/C Limp!Sam. Set season five.


Disclaimer: Not mine.

I really wish I was more wordy. I feel like this is written too simply. Sorry if it is but the thing is if I try to write more to something, there is a good chance I won't finish it at all.

Let me know what you guys think. When I don't get many reviews I feel like what I've written sucks so good or bad, I appreciate reviews and they do, in fact, fuel me to write more Sastiel.

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Castiel was not human, he could not pull of acting human no matter how hard he tried. That made becoming basically human so much harder.

He felt useless and weak, unable to help in the battles the Winchester boys faced.

Sam swore to him that he wasn't useless. "We couldn't do this without you, Castiel." Sam had said, holding the angel close. "_I _couldn't do this without you."

Castiel had nodded, trying to believe him.

He was worthless in hunts but he refused to leave the Winchester's to fend for themselves. He would fight his weakness if it meant protecting them.

And then Sam went under.

Castiel, Sam and Dean were in the process of attempting to banish an angry spirit. Fifteen years earlier, a child had drowned in a lake and was now taking innocent victims in the same way he had gone.

An ethereal glow lit up the darkness as the spirit made himself known by hurling Castiel and Dean in opposite directions, leaving Sam unguarded.

Castiel smashed into the hard ground, a grunt of pain escaping his lips. The pain was new to him. He still found himself confused whenever he was assaulted by it.

Overcoming his confusion, Castiel heard Dean yell his brother's name as Sam was tossed into the frigid, inky black waters.

"Sam!" Castiel and Dean yelled in unison. Castiel dug his hands into the packed earth, awaiting to see Sam's head pop back up.

It didn't.

Castiel was at the water within a few seconds, pulling his coat off and diving into the icy water. Dean attempted to follow, only to be stopped by Castiel.

"No, Dean." The angel panted, the cold water sending violent shivers throughout his body. "Finish the banishment. I'll get him."

Dean's hazel eyes were frantic but he nodded, understanding that if he didn't get this done, none of them were emerging from the water.

Castiel would not be weak, not when Sam's life was in danger. He would fight to the death to protect Sam.

Taking a deep breath, Castiel dove under the waves, his hands searching for anything Sam Winchester.

Darkness water clogged Castiel's vision. He saw nothing but black. His hands clutched hopelessly at water-logged sediment at the bottom of the large lake. His lungs were screaming for air but he would not break the surface until he had found Sam.

He took an involuntary breath, his body desperately seeking oxygen. His mind screamed at him to go back, to seek out the air it so desperately needed but Castiel would not waver.

His searching hands finally found purchase on the rough fabric of Sam's jacket and Castiel almost cried in relief but there was no time for that now. He needed air.

Kicking up from the floor of the lake, spreading mud and sediment, Castiel began his ascent to the surface, Sam's dead weight clutched in his arms.

The angel's head broke the surface, a frenzied gasp of air being drug into his lungs. He fought to bring Sam's limp body above the surface but without the floor of the lake to steady him, he found he couldn't.

Strong arms surrounded Castiel and Sam. Arms pulling Sam above water and dragging him and the angel back to shore.

"C'mon Cas!" Dean screamed, obviously finished banishing the spirit. "Help me get him to shore!"

Castiel didn't know how he ended up on the soft sand of the beach, didn't know how he found the strength to haul himself and Sam back but the next thing he knew, Sam was on his back in the sand and Dean was tilting his head back, beginning CPR.

Castiel wavered as he watched Dean fight to bring his baby brother back. Weakness encompassed him. He was too late, too weak. He had failed Sam. Sam was dead because he wasn't able to save him.

Shaking fingers pressed gently to Sam's cold forehead, willing the strength to come. Sam remained motionless, Dean continued compressions.

Castiel didn't notice the tears rolling down his pale cheeks. All he could notice was Sam dead in front of him.

"Sam?" Castiel choked. "I'm sorry."

A ear-shattering, sorrowful scream filled the air and it took Castiel a moment to realize that it was him. Castiel buried his vessel's face into the chilled sand, screams of agony reverberating off the distant trees.

Hands clutched desperately at dripping wet hair and the screams continued. Agonizing screams that could shake even the most careless man to the core.

The agony of failure ate away at Castiel.

The screams were loud, filling Castiel's ears but he could still hear the choking, The violent choking sound and the sound of water sloshing as it exited Sam's lungs.

Castiel's head whipped around, spraying sand and water, and before he could comprehend what was happening, his hands were shoving Dean away as he pulled Sam's body into his arms.

Violent shudders racked Sam as he fought to bring in oxygen, hacking coughs echoing the small beach.

He couldn't see, his hearing had faded. All he knew was the sensation of Sam's drenched body against his chest. Vaguely, he felt Dean's hand gripping Sam's wrist in an attempt to check his pulse.

"Sam?" Castiel whispered, his sight and hearing rushing back as Sam's hands clutched weakly at his soaked shirt.

"Wha?" Sam voice was scratchy and so horribly weak sounding but it was music to Castiel's ears. Sam was alive and that's all he wanted to comprehend.

"Sammy?" Dean mumbled, holding Sam's face in his hands as Castiel held him. "You okay?"

Sam's dark eyes were confused. "Wha' 'appened?" He slurred.

"You obviously decided it was time for a nighttime swim, Sammy." Dean said, a huge smile on his face, happy that his brother was alive.

"Oh." Sam remembered. Looking up through wet eyelashes, Sam studied Castiel's face. "You 'kay?" He asked quietly, always thinking of others before himself.

Castiel nodded, his eyes closed. "Just…I…I just need a minute."

Sam nodded slightly, allowing himself to be rocked back and forth like an infant. Dean went about checking Sam's vitals while Castiel fought to compose himself.

The weakness was prevalent and it terrified Castiel. He had almost lost Sam because of his weakness and to him, that was unacceptable.

Although, if there was anything learned from his time with the Winchester's, it was to work with what he had. He didn't consider himself to have much but he would work with the little he did.

He would not allow this to happen again. Despite his bothersome weakness, he would not allow it to put Sam in harm again.

He may have been cut off from Heaven but he wouldn't let that hinder him.

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